Christian Comic Arts Society
A Network of Christian Fellowship for Comics Fans, Pros, and Amateurs
JUNE 2010-Learning to let go.
When I was eleven I had a dream. No, it was more than a dream, it was a goal, a mission. My mission was to do comics as an adult. That is what I told myself what I wanted to do. And from that day I began to train myself to become the best comic book artist that I could be. I was determined to accomplish this dream.
Years passed and I never stop training as an artist and I held tight to the focus until I became a Christian in my early twenties. This was after a failed attempt to start a comic book company after high school and trying to find my place with God. In my mid-twenties God revitalize my desire to do comics and the eleven year old was at it again. This time it was for the Lord, to save souls. Ten years passed and after two publishers fell through and 300 pages later the dream was realized with Leeway Artisans. Even though it took a year to get it out due to printing, spiritual and financial setbacks. But the dream was realized, however the eleven year old had grown up and after so many years of struggle, good times and bad times, setbacks and life in general he forgot about the joy of doing comics. Yes, to reach goals you have to become disciplined and make plans and improve, but the eleven yeaqr old dream was to do comic books and that it.
If you are a believer and if you are following a dream, then you know the dream truly originated from God not you. God revealed that to me years ago. Of course I forgot or blacked it out. It's funny how God used comics to really help me growing up. I had some rough things happen in life, but superheroes never gave up through adversity. I learned that from Spider-man and X-men comics. I'm not joking. I was once asked what person influenced you the most that you admire. My answer was Uncle Ben(I was in a group of ten peopel in a bible study, the only person that understood my answer was a guy who also read comics. And if you are a long -time reader of Spider-man you would understand my answer also.) My father I believe tried his best, but he wasn't the best role-model and God used a fictional character to at least get by and know what a Father was until I knew our heavenly Father. What I'm saying, God works in strange ways. But he works-for our good-more for our good than his glory I believe.
With that, my dream was accomplished, I did my part , I kept the faith, worked on my comic and it is being published. The eleven year old boy should be happy. But he was corrupted. The years went by as a Christian and he held on to the dream as if it was his own. As if he made it happen and had to make it grow and flourish. He sowed the seed and thought he could make it come forth.
God told me to let go of the marketing and promoting of my comic awhile ago. I think I wrote about it in a blog too. I finally did and I'm screaming and kickng and angry at God. I feel it was my Isaac and now you ask me to let it go like that after the years and years of struggle, After the years and years of ridicule by family and friends Who now of course admire and respect me beacuse I didn't give up.THIS WAS MINE! THIS WAS MINE!
It's funny, giving up that part of my dream which I was never suppose to burden, I feel such freedom(when I'm not in a tantrum), I know the complaining in me will stop and I know it's better this way. My comic is not a business first, it's a ministry. And only God can build a ministry right. Not to say a business can't be Godly, because you have to also allow God to have that too. But in my case I can't approach it with a human business plan. I have to approach it in prayer, in trust and just doing my art. I feel free, though it's hard at times when you've been a slave for a long time. I'm learning to live not just survive.
The flip side, you may ask is the eleven year old laid to rest. No, but the corruption from age and bitterness is leaving him. Leaving me. I'm feeling the same innocence I had back then and yea it's scary at times but what dream and risk isn't.
Comment
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Comment by Dori Kortekaas (Comics By Dori) on May 27, 2011 at 10:13pm -
Ya I can so relate to this entire entry! I was unhappy with my life, kinda bored. I am creative but gave that up because of my family for a more practical job. Well, my job is fine. It pays the bills but each day I'd just be going through the motions. I talk to God all the time. Anyways, it would drive me crazy. I'd see something and it would capture my attention. I'd want to draw it. When I couldn't, I'd look at my hands and tears would come down my face. Because I couldn't do the thing I wanted. And, I'd sigh and go back to work or whatever. Finally, I was saying to God, "What do you want me to do? Because I have no idea where to go next but I can't keep doing this." And, he just gave me ART! I was like, "ART?!" I can't draw. But, ok. If you want me to do art, how?" and, I let it go. Life went on. I thought if I am going to try for a different job, I should get a reference in something other than the work I am doing. But, how? And, God said to volunteer. So, I thought about it. I asked him doing what? And, he was saying to me well if you were whoever you wanted to be, what would that person be doing? I thought that person would be hanging out with creative people being creative. LOL So a year ago I thought I could volunteer at an art gallery. I didn't know how tho. Sp, I also wanted to learn Japanese. I have friends in Japan. IN that class, I met someone who was working at the art gallery I wanted to work at. The funny thing was I knew it had to be from God because it turned out this was my minister from 19 years ago! He was the one who dedicated my son to God!!! So, I applied and got in with the art gallery. I was allowed to be a docent eventhough I could not make the mandatory meetings on Monday since I worked my other job! Doors just kept opening. In one year God had me work as a docent at an art gallery, do art fundraising, go to gallery exhibition openings and creative and supply a studio. I want to use rt eventually to raise money for charity and for missions. So, it's interesting to see how God is moving. Like you, I get it into my head I need to market and stuff but then I remember that God is directing this and if I am going to be in art it will be in a way he wants. It's scary. I think ok God should I go to school? He's like NO! Hmm why not? I think and He answers me like this, " I will teach you and when you succeed there will be no question it will be because of me." Bach always wrote music. He signed stuff To GOD's Glory or something like that. So, He gave me this idea to do art but at first I had no idea what kind. I love anime and manga. Lately, I learned about American comics which are also really inspiring! Suddenly, this year he has gotten me in the professional comic art community where I live. I'm hanging out with people I can't believe I am even in the same room with. Even now, YOU contacted me! WOW! What's God doing? I was sad even because many of the comic artists are secular and next thing you know I get a link that leads to this site. Now, I am making artist friends here! It's amazing. I don't have a plan. I just ask God...ok what now? And, yeah...it's scary! LOL My family didn't take me serious. But they see all the stuff happening and so are watching and waiting. That adds pressure as I want to prove I can do it. Then I think NO! I won't do it. GOD will do it and it will be to HIS GLORY :) You got published!!! That is so awesome. I don't even have a clue if God will get me published. It seems for the moment my goal is to learn and hopefully make a mini self published comic by the end of the year. Bear in mind, I just started to really seriously practice and learn to draw around March. So, to me, if God pulls it off to where I have an actual published comic to sell in next April's ComicFest in my city, I know He definitely is wanting me to go in that direction. If not, well, I just have to wait and see where he wants me to go with the art thing. So my approach is, Hmm ok God, Let's see what you are gonna do this year :) Anyways, nice to meet you!
CCAS at Comic-Con
The 'Spirituality in Comics' Panel from San Diego Comic-Con 2011
In comics, movies, and even Broadway musicals like “The Book Of Mormon”, spiritual themed work seems to be unexpectedly coming from the least religious of sources.
Panelists including SERGIO CARIELLO (The Action Bible), RUSSELL DALTON (Marvelous Myths: Marvel Superheroes and Everyday Faith), BUZZ DIXON (Serenity/Hits & Misses), and MIKE SHIELDS (Blue Blazes) discuss how a new generation of comics and pop culture are exploring timeless truths and also address the question “Is Mass Media Our New Church?”
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